'Bridezilla' excludes family from wedding to cut costs; it turns out to be elaborate lie.

The whole wedding turned out to just be an elaborate lie...

Last Christmas, my partner's brother proposed to his sweetie. He selected his teenage daughter, not my partner, to be the best man. Best daughter? Super adorable! However, she ultimately declined because she hates her future stepmum, who will henceforth be referred to as Bridezilla...

So BIL asks my partner to be the best man. My partner hates Bridezilla and questions his brother's sanity, but we're all entitled to our own choices, so of course he's supportive.

Also he's always really wanted to be a best man because he's always wanted to give a speech in front of a crowd. (I told him he should probably just join Toastmasters if this is his ambition.)

Then he finds out that I'm not invited to the wedding. Apparently my in-laws don't like me. What did I ever do? I recall BIL and I getting on quite well, because even though we have nothing else in common, he at least appreciates my sense of humor. This causes a lot of contention in our relationship.

The in-laws all mass unfriend me on Facebook one day, which was super bewildering. Partner decides he's still going and I can just chill at his mum's house that day because you can't disappoint family (umm, hello? I'm family too).

In the meantime, months pass and my partner keeps bugging BIL and the rest of the family about 'when is the wedding? We need to buy plane tickets.' 'Oh, sometime in May. No date set yet.' It's now February. Still no date. Finally, he talks to his mother about the wedding and me not being invited and gets the full story.

Apparently Bridezilla and my in-laws had a talk about us after our visit last summer and decided we suck because we're white collar and they're blue collar. It's not that we were snobby or anything, they just don't like our vibe.

They hate our clothing, they hate our hobbies, hate the fact that we don't watch TV or read comic books, hate that we went to university and have interesting careers, and they think it's ridiculous that we don't eat fast food and we go to the gym often.

They simply just can't relate to us. They can't shut my partner out because he's family, but I'm an in-law. The only person who likes me is our niece. Bridezilla was the one who raised the first pitchfork, too.

MIL now feels bad about jumping on the bandwagon back then and decides to talk to Bridezilla about how you just don't shut out the best man's spouse, no matter how much you don't like her.

The only thing I really have going against me is that I'm a bit shy and quiet around them, and they think I'm a picky eater. It's not like I'm inclined to get drunk and dance on tables at weddings or any other awful personality flaws like that.

BIL messages my partner a couple of days ago and says that I can come to the wedding, but there will be no accommodations. Which is to say, I have a life threatening peanut allergy and they won't even go so far as to share that info with the venue.

If I want to eat, I should do it before the wedding. If they end up putting peanuts on the menu, I should just keep my Epi-Pen handy and hope no one breathes on me. Wait, you don't even have the menu set yet?

My partner is appalled and finally stands up for me. He says that if BIL wants to risk my life (and the life of our unborn child), then it would be much easier if we simply didn't attend and BIL finds himself a new best man.

Also that he's disappointed because BIL was never like this before, and when did he become such a monster? BIL turns on a dime and says 'you're right, I'm so sorry. I'm being really out of line right now. We'll figure something out.'

Today BIL figured something out. He's leaving his fiance this Saturday. There will be no wedding. I'm jumping for joy! Not even because of the way Bridezilla treated me. People don't have to be forced to like anyone they don't want to like, and it's their wedding to conduct as they see fit. I'm just happy that if I'm not invited/welcome, my partner would duck out.

You see, I'm delighted because my wonderful niece no longer has to have that nightmare of a woman as a stepmother. Now she and her father can finally start rebuilding their relationship which was once lovely and has suffered immensely since Bridezilla came into their lives.

Here's the kicker...it turns out the reason no wedding date had been set yet is because Bridezilla ran up a bunch of credit card debt for both her and BIL by buying herself fancy clothes and meals and trying to live like rich people, and there was no money left to even secure the deposit on the restaurant.

They weren't even broke because they already spent all of their money on the wedding or their planned honeymoon to Bermuda. This whole time, those were expensive dreams that were never realistically going to happen.

In the end, Bridezilla was just trying to make her dream wedding as affordable as possible by minimizing the number of guests from BIL's side. Hence why I (and apparently few other people) were rejected.

Maybe now that she's about to be single, she can just marry herself now or something. I'm sure she can open up another credit card and swing that.

Of course, the jury of wedding shamers was eager to weigh in on this mess. Here's what people had to say...

Basic-Regret-6263 said:

Yeah, glad she's gone, but I think there needs to be more focus on the fact that your in-laws decided to shun you, and your partner was ok with it.

FryOneFatManic said:

If the honeymoon has already been paid for using BIL's card, BIL should still go and take his daughter instead of bridezilla.

Coco_Dirichlet said:

You should do couple's therapy. I don't understand how you are so calm about your husband not standing up for you until they put your life on danger. And now everyone in his family gets a pass over this? How long until they do it again or do it to your child?

TumbleweedHuman2934 said:

Wow! What a hot mess. I really hope all that debt gets put in her lap instead of BIL being held responsible for some of it. That sounds like a problem I wouldn't want to get anywhere near. Yikes! So glad BIL finally got his head out of his backside to see the truth. He could have seriously destroyed his relationship with his daughter because of this trifling fool.

I really hope the next time his daughter has something to say he will actually listen instead of allowing his lower 48 do all the thinking for him. I don't care how pretty some woman is or how good she might be in bed if she is making your kid miserable you need to pay attention.

Welp, there you have it!

Everyone agreed unanimously here that this brother-in-law dodged a bullet with Bridezilla, but nobody was willing to forget the small detail of OP's partner taking their sweet time to defend their family. Better luck next time, everyone...