Woman refuses to allow brother's boyfriend at wedding; 'he's a stranger.' AITA?
'AITA for not wanting a stranger at my wedding?'
A couple of months ago, my brother told me he had been dating a guy and wanted to bring him as his guest to my wedding. My wedding is a very small and intimate one, with only family and close friends of myself and my fiancee invited.
I asked who this guy was, and he wasn't anyone I've ever met before. My fiancee and I had taken care to only invite the people we are closest too, and I really didn't want someone I've never even met before there.
My brother wasn't happy. He said it was the perfect opportunity to introduce his new boyfriend to the family. I said my wedding isn't for that; it's for celebrating my marriage. To compromise, I suggested he plan a family dinner and bring his boyfriend to that. Once the dinner was over, I'd have met the boyfriend, so I'd probably feel more comfortable going to the wedding.
My brother agreed. I followed up with him a week later asking when the dinner was, and he asked me to schedule it. I said I was in the middle of planning a wedding, and I felt he needed to schedule it. I followed up later, and he said he wasn't sure what day would work. He never brought it up after that, and neither did I, because I was so busy.
My wedding is next week, and my brother still wants to bring his boyfriend, but I said no. I don't want s stranger at my wedding. At this point it is too late to schedule dinner, because the next week is booked with wedding activities, and there's no day I'll have time to drive two hours to where the rest of the family is. He says I'm being a dick to not let him bring his boyfriend to a wedding.
Here were the top rated comments from readers:
Bruh NTA. It’s no unreasonable to not want strangers at your wedding. ESP if it’s a small and intimate affair. Your brother had plenty of time to meet your completely reasonable request and it’s not on you that he failed to completely plan a simple family dinner.
Honestly I'm starting to think that brother REALLY only wants to sabotage OP's wedding...
NTA..It's your day, your way. If it's a small wedding without a bunch of plus ones, then why should he get a free pass? Your wedding is definitely NOT the venue for introducing a new partner to the family. Tell him no and go back to planning your special day. Good luck with your upcoming nuptials.
How are people saying its tacky to not allow a +1 in these comments. NTA. Small and intimate weddings are just that...friends and close family. Not a family reunion and not a place where you bring people for the first time. This isn't a full blown wedding.
NTA. It was your brothers responsibility to schedule the dinner and introduce his bf to his family so that you could feel comfortable potentially inviting him. Since he didn’t do that I don’t think you’re obligated to invite or feel bad. He will get over it hopefully.
NTA. Absolutely wrong place and wrong time to introduce his boyfriend. And a small intimate wedding is not the right place for your Brother to bring his boyfriend you never met. He had every opportunity the last couple months and didn't set up the requested meeting.So, do you think the OP was being too harsh when they tried to reject a 'stranger' from their wedding or do you think they were in the right to defend their special day?